saturday night’s alright for fighting

With the first month of the new year almost as dead and buried as the last one I find myself sitting on my back porch with a cigar and a crown rocks- residual dividends from a party last week in this very spot. It is a surprisingly mild January night in light of the more balmy weather Austin has experienced these last few days but that is a good thing. It allows me to enjoy the four by eight elevated concrete slab the complex brochure heralded the “outdoor entertainment area” that I just haven’t gotten enough entertainment out of recently. The winter months have careened by in a blur of events on top of events. From system upgrades at work to TV upgrades at Christmas (thanks Mom and Dad) and moments of lovely nothings and everythings with my favorite girl sprinkled in between it is safe to say that I find my self content. And, for the first time in a long time- I am OK with that.

I think that as a male living in the early 21st century I have been bombarded with the worldly message that being content isn’t OK. I am suppose to be dissatisfied with something or else I wouldn’t buy new clothes, a new car and be in the gym every night trying to develop those new muscles at the base of my abdomen- those ones I’ve never had. It isn’t just media messages either- even in my personal life I’ve seen the results of trying to be too content with a situation, most usually relationships on very personal levels. I think too often we confuse the word content with word lazy.

If my over tiredness with the 60 plus hours I put on my time sheet in the office doesn’t tell the tale enough- I don’t think I can be described as lazy. Not anymore at least.

I took a plane ride recently from Amarillo, Tx back into Austin and sat next to a man who talked for the whole flight. He wasn’t really talking to me, I think he was talking to the lady sitting next to me or the man he obviously had some relation with in the seat across the aisle or anybody who would listen for that matter- I was just caught in the middle with my tray table up and no room for me to hide in my laptop. The topic of conversation was marriage. Specifically his. Specifically the fact that he had been married 3 times, had kids with each woman, loves those kids and hates the women. He went on about each marriage. How either himself or the woman was unfaithful and unfulfilled. Here is a man who isn’t OK with being content. I know this because he kept talking about how he wanted more. Not another chance with one of the women. Not another shot at being a better father or a better husband, but more for himself.

He still wore the wedding ring from his last marriage. He said that he gets more respect in his business if clients think he is married, and happily.

I wonder what his children think?

at every occasion i’ll be ready


~ by mlvassallo on January 26, 2008.

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